Sex is an activity that we often wish lasted longer than it does, but unfortunately it is dependent upon how long the male partner can starve off ejaculation. According to a 2015 article in Esquire Magazine that summarized findings of the Canadian and American Sex Therapists Association, intercourse lasts “an average of 3 to 7 minutes.” This is from insertion to ejaculation only. Think about it – 3 to 7 minutes is not very long at all for the main event. In comparison, the same article reports that premature ejaculation happens in “1 out of 3” males reporting and suggests a lasting time of “3 minutes or less.” So, it stands to reason that even those having sex an average amount of time may want to increase lasting time. So, how do you help your man last longer in bed?
DISTRACTION: How many movies have you seen where the man is trying to last longer in bed and he is thinking about Football players, his mother (ewww), or otherwise trying to distract himself from what is actually happening under the sheets. In the popular movie Along Came Polly, Ben Stiller is making love to Jennifer Anniston and counts to 50 before ejaculating – screaming out “50!” as he cums. This method can work sometimes and for some men. The idea is to take the man’s attention off of the fact that he is having sex and that sex feels good, and forcing him to think of less “erotic” things, such as the stats of his favorite football players.
GO SLOW SO YOU WON’T BLOW: The friction involved in sex (the stimulation from the in/out pumping) is what builds a man to orgasm. The faster the thrusting, the more likely orgasm is to happen quickly. Therefore, it stands to reason if you thrust more slowly the time to work up to orgasm may take a bit longer. To do this you need to pay attention to your rhythm – the man will thrust in, deep – and STAY PUT for a few seconds. Then, slowly remove to almost being taken out of the vagina, and slowly thrust back in. The only time you should increase the speed is when you do finally want to ejaculate. Now, unfortunately, this technique may not last for those males who do not maintain hardness without constant friction.
VARY YOUR STROKES: If you find that the complete slowdown method doesn’t work, you may try the expert patented “7 / 9” method, designed by UK sexpert A.L Harper. With this method the male will perform “7 faster in/out thrusts and then follow that by 9 slower in/out thrusts.” This pattern will be repeated as long as intercourse is trying to be maintained. This method seems to give the female ample opportunity to enjoy intercourse as well as providing enough stimulation for the man to remain erect.
PC PUMPS: Much like the female Kegel exercise, men can use a similar exercise to strengthen their own muscles. The male pubococcygeus muscle goes from his anus and wraps around the urinary sphincter. In short, it helps to control the start / stop of urine. Strengthening this muscle helps to stimulate proper blood flow to the penis and can help with delaying orgasm, as well as simply creating better penile health.
SHALLOW STROKES: In keeping with the idea of limiting stimulation to make intercourse last longer, taking more shallow strokes can also help to delay ejaculation. Shallow strokes can be combined with the other methods such as the 7/9 technique. By preventing the penis to be completely stimulated on the entire shaft, the man can control the build of arousal.
COCK RINGS: Sometimes all a man needs is a way to maintain the hardness of his erection while enjoying sexual stimulation. Cock rings are unique little rubber rings that, when placed correctly over the shaft and under the balls, put pressure on the veins that bring blood into the penis and create a harder erection that will last longer. While this may not in and of itself prevent ejaculation, it can allow the male to remain harder-longer and this can aid in starving off ejaculation when combining with other techniques.